i used to worry that i would get lost in thought.
i sometimes forget how to walk. i'll roll out of bed and fall flat on my
face on the floor because i can't remember how to balance on my feet.
Sometimes it comes upon me suddenly: i'll be walking along thinking deeply
and then just forget to lift up my feet, and i'll fall forward to the ground.
The person I am emerged first online, where the anonymity of text gave me
the courage to be myself and the freedom to experiment around until I found a
self that I liked and wanted to show to the world. I'm still trying to
become more like myself irl. I can't help but become more like TeleMuse,
you can only pretend to be something for so long until you truly are that
thing.
Sometimes I just suddenly *understand* this idea that all the self help
gurus talk about but that I never truly grasped before and I try to explain my
epiphany to others and they're like "that's obvious, that's yesterday's
self-help advice" and I just *know* that they, like me pre-epiphany, don't
*really* understand it, they just think that they do. It's the whole thing
will awakening to the next level; the world is full of robots walking around
asleep.
|
