I saw this young lady sleeping in the office one day. I
stopped and I stood there, watching her for a time as her lips
quivered slightly, as her chest rose and fell with rhythmic breathing.
And that was when I stopped being put off by her occasional
crude antics and began to find them instead rather endearing.
I wrote a letter today. I don't like writing letters so much
because regardless of what I'm writing I turn it into fiction. Of
course, everything writing is fiction since it's all the author's
perspective and therefore only one side of the truth; then again, if
there is no absolute truth than perhaps one person's honest
perspective is the truth. But that doesn't matter, because I go
above and beyond to fictionalize a bit. I like to give my life, and
through it my letters, a sense of unity and of completion, and that
requires waxing poetic and whimsical sometimes.
I like to make my letters interesting, so I write them on
scraps of paper that I find on my walks, or magazine ads, or in the
margines of pamphlets. Today I wrote a letter in the margines of
the table of contents to an old DOS 3.0 manual. I don't know if it
was any good.
I hate ambiguity in relationships. Why is it that girls never tell
you how they actually feel about you? Or at least, none that I've
dated ever have. I guess it's not a girl thing so much as a person
thing. People have trouble admitting their true feelings, openning
themselves up to rejection. Well, not me so much anymore; I've
gotten so used to rejection that it's become an old friend. =) Now
if I could just understand my own feelings.
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